roadside flowers and an apparition

30 Jun

i am forty one years of age tomorrow
the same age my father was when we landed in this country
i’m not sure what the significance of that is
other than the realization of a circuitous flow of time

exactly twenty years ago somewhere around norman oklahoma
on my way out to the west coast following irrational dreams of making films
i stopped briefly to relieve myself in a field of roadside flowers
from beyond the flat line of the green earth appeared a teenage girl
with a shirt which said: My Dad Is A Hell’s Angel
(the font was helvetica)
she laughed at my hurried attempts to finish and re-button my jeans
she passed by me
and calmly crossed the major thoroughfare
ahead of convoys of semis and caravans driven by old retired septuagenarians
probably with their own obtuse dreams of an america that once existed
she blended into the wild green flat horizon on the other side of the highway
and i got into my VW and smudged myself onto the canvas
that was eternal transcontinental traffic
everyone with delusions of a new start seems to think it lies out west
it doesn’t


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